Notes from the Life of a Dysfunctional Housewife: Tyler's Birthday

Friday, July 03, 2009

Tyler's Birthday

Ty has always been one to downplay his birthday. I should know that after 8 years of knowing him, so I should have known that he wouldn't really want to go to Sundance overnight and go hiking all day for his birthday. He would rather stay home and get the house really clean. I mean really clean. Like, he cleaned the oven on his birthday clean. In his defense he let me take him to Transformers the night before and he really liked it. He let himself have a little fun.

I should have known this would make him happy.

I was thinking of his birthdays of in years past. The first one I ever spent with him was low key at his house in California with his family. His next birthday he was not so happy, even though I was. I made him to go Vegas for the weekend. We stayed at the Luxor and went and saw "O" by Cirque de Soleil. Heavenly for me, not so much for him. Travel + spending money = not his forte. I don't expect big productions for birthdays, I just like to plan them every once in a while.

His next birthday we were in California again. He had a great time cleaning out his parent's attic all day long. And when I say he had fun, he really did. He loved organizing the attic and seeing all his stuff from when he was a little kid. Fun for him. Anyways, I should just learn to always play it low key for him. bla.

Anyways, the kids spent the night at my parents and we had most of the day to ourselves. At night we went and had dinner with my family at Brick Oven and then we went back to my parent's house for cake and ice cream.

Happy Birthday Ty! We love you and your very unique self.

2 comments:

M and B Jones said...: I think we ruined him on his first birthday when we invited every kid in the ward to his party. He was overwhelmed, to say the least!

Well, anyway, we're glad he allowed some celebration. We love you, Tyler. You're a good man.; 7:43 PM
Marilyn said...: Hey you guys want to spend a weekend at my house? I have a bunch of stuff that needs cleaned!!!! Ha Ha Cute pictures!; 1:05 PM

Jackson"s Quote Wall of Fame

1.10 "Mom! I figured it out! White is the same color as milk and snow!"
10.27.09 - "Mom, why do you do what you do-ed when you did, (pause) what you did?" (Translation - Why do you always do that?)
7.23.09 - When we were in Michigan Grandma Jones asked about the talk I gave on Sunday. She said, "Shelly what was your talk on?" Without looking up from his dinner Jackson said, "It was on a piece of paper."
"Ugh, I am fwustwated! You guys stop laughing at me." (Talking to me and Ty)
"Mom, what happens if we don't have arms?"
"Mom, what happens if we don't have lips?"
"Mom, what happens if we don't have uvulas?"
"Mom, I have an infection in my throat. It's behind my uvula."
Whenever Hayden is being reprimanded or sent to time out Jackson asks, "Mom, are you happy at me?" or he says, "Mom, I am a good boy."
"Daddy, I'm going to get you two earings and a nice dress because you are a girl."
While crying Jackson said, "Mom, I have tears coming out. I'm just going to let them fall, they will just dry."
"Mom, did I pop out of your belly button?"
"Mommy, did you know Santa loves me?"
After I put Jackson to bed he came out and said, "Mom. Stop making noises! I can't sleep. No spraying (I had been pre-treating laundry with shout) or talking, or wrestling, or just, like, playing with dad." And then he huffed back to his room.
"Ow, Mom! I hurt my leg. Now I won't be so stinkin cute!"
"Dad, I want you to read me stories. You big fat pig!"
Jackson: "Mom, I'm going to lick you." Me: "Do NOT lick me." Jackson: "Do you want me to put a candy corn up your nose?" (As if those two things are related. Don't lick, therefore, stick candy corns up my nose.)
"Daddy sits in dog poo and does his homework. HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE"
(While we were driving in the car) Mom! I have to go potty! Can I pee on the car?
I'm just a leeeeeeeetle bit mad, not a lot mad, just a leeeeeeeeetle bit.
"The Holy Ghost has three holes."
"No! Don't kill the fly! He doesn't want to be killed! He wants to be alive!" Me: "Jackson, I'm going to kill the fly. It's in my house and they're gross." Jackson: "I will just squish the spiders." Me: "If you get to squish the spiders, I get to kill the flies." Jackson: "Ok."
Me: "Jackson, I love you." Jackson: "You're welcome. I love you too."
Jackson: "Is your tooth all gone?' Me: "Yes." (I had to get a tooth pulled) Jackson:"I will just be a Dentist so that I can just put your tooth back in for you." (Won't that be the greatest day of my life, when my son becomes a dentist? Then he can really help me when I'm old and all my teeth have even more major problems.)
Jackson: "I love you now Mommy, but I didn't love you at the store."
Me: "Tell you father not to be ridiculous." Jackson: "Don't be a dickless."
Jackson came down the hall with a blanket tied around him like a cape. "Mom, I have a cape! Will you help me fly?" Two minutes later, "Mom! I need help!" (He still wasn't flying.)
"I need blue floss so my teeth won't fall out."
"I ate all my sugary junk."
Almost every night when Jackson is going to bed he stalls by asking, "Mom can I watch a show with you? Can I watch Dancing Through The Stars?"
"Can I have my own Marshmallow Maybes?" ( I have told him a thousand times that it is "Mateys")
Grandpa Jones came over and saw our new couches. Jackson informed him that, "Your bum goes here!" and pointed to a spot on the couch.
While looking at himself in the mirror Jackson said, "You are my best friend."
As we were reading a book about the Great Barrier Reef by Australia Jackson said, "You go there with Daddy tomorrow and Grandma Jones will watch me." (Don't I wish?)
While pointing the remote at Ty: "I turned you into a TV!"
After I spiked Jackson's hair he looked into the mirror and said, "I look like a porcupine!"
Phrases Jackson says every day: "Would that be sound good?" and "What color is the (his) poo?"
While walking from our car to our house, a dog was running around on the grass and started running toward Jackson. He screamed the loudest high-pitch scream ever uttered by a child and then yelled, "Mommy, Mommy!" while running to me. After we made it into the house Jackson said (while crying), "I'm scared of dogs. I just like cats."
Jackson: "You are a cookie. I'm going to eat you all gone." Shelly: "No you are a cookie" J: "(Gasp) I am not a cookie! I don't go in the oven!"
Jackson to Tyler: "Turn around, leave, and never come back."
"Awwwww, you are my precious mommy."
"You are a pineapple. I'm going to eat you up."
"I have to go on a mission at church. I have to leave. You can't come. Don't cry mom."
Jackson: "I want to go to the Trampolines (Jump On It)!" Me: "We'll go when you're potty trained." J: "I don't want my potty train!"
"Good job mom. You good job jobber. You're a great job." (Apparently I've been emphasizing "good job" lately.)
"I'm a sad little monkey. I need my grandma."
Jackson: "On Christmas we will celebrate Jesus's Birthday and he will need a party hat."
(Jackson was talking about the Book, "How the Grinch Stole Christmas") Jackson: "And the Grinch tried to steal their stuff." Me: "We don't steal things, do we?" Jackson: "Do we play nicely with the Grinch?"
(Jackson was hopping on the floor like a frog instead of eating dinner) Me: "Eat your food frog!" Jackson: "Eat your mommy! Ribbit."
"You've got to be kidding me guys!"
"Do dogs eat dog poo?"
Me: Do you want a party with Grandma and Grandpa? Jackson: No I want to party with Santa.

Hayden is Talking

2.4.11 "He is being a goofpants." (talking about Jackson)
2.4.11 "He is being a slow coach." (Also talking about Jackson - and his ability to get ready for bed.)
12.8.10 "Mom, did you go to a baby shower?" Me: "Yes." H: "Did you put the baby in the shower?!"
6.10 "Mom, it is indescribable because it's not describable."
Hayden: "Mom, what are you reading?" Me: "Fablehaven." Hayden: GASP "Like me?" Me: "What do you mean?" Hayden: "FableHAYDEN!"
1.10 Me: "Hayden your brother is hyper!" Hayden: "Is he going to go to hyperspace?"
When I put Hayden down for a nap I always tell him not to break the rules (which are basically no getting out of bed). The other day he came out of his room after taking a nap and said, "Mom. I fixed the rules. They aren't broke." (aka - he went right to sleep and didn't get out of bed.)
8.16.09 "Mom, are you done being a cranky pants?:
When Hayden was mad at me he said, "AAAAAH! I want to BONK you on de HEAD!" And he did.
Mommy: "Hayden, where do we go pee pee?" Hayden: "On . . . the . . . FLOOR! Hahahahaha."
"It stinks like a horse!"
"What's up, sir?"
"I have a question for you! What is happening?"
"Mom, can I be nakie for a minute?"
"Mom, sing Alladin" (I'm translating) Me: "You sing Alladin" (A whole new world) Hayden: "Ok. Go Laddi, Go Laddi, Go Laddi."
Tonight Jackson found the big dipper in the sky and said, "Look! The big dipper!" To which Hayden said, "Star! No Dip!"
"More Kistal (Crystal) Light!" I'm trying to replace my Diet Dr. Pepper with something, and apparently he's caught on to what it is.
"No sceeeming (screaming) Hyrum! (Those of you in my ward might know who he was yelling this at.)
Belly Button = "Buddy Button"
Hayden came with me to practice the organ. He stood up on the bench ( which he knows he is not suppossed to do) Then, with a huge smile on his face, he said, "Naughty!"
Jackson had to go potty and I told him to show Hayden how to do it. He was standing up and when he started to go pee pee Hayden said the most enthusiastic, "Oh Wow!" I've ever heard him say.