Notes from the Life of a Dysfunctional Housewife: Merry (Late) Christmas!

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Merry (Late) Christmas!

I have been in pajamas since Thursday and on the BRAT diet since Friday. We all had a great Christmas, even though Hayden got sick Christmas Eve, and Jackson got sick Christmas night. I followed on Friday and I'm pretty sure Tyler is catching all of our "fun" . . . right now. (Sorry to everyone at my Grandma's house Christmas Eve.) The boys still had a great Christmas and did not disappoint with their reactions. More pictures to come (for the Grandparents) as this is all I can manage for today. And now I'm going back to bed. Peace out.

4 comments:

M and B Jones said...: G and G Jones thank you for your efforts in posting pictures and look forward to more. Jackson looks like he thought Santa was OK, but Hayden clearly didn't enjoy the fun! Hope you're all feeling better soon. We love you!; 4:43 AM
Robyn said...: It sucks to be sick on Christmas. I am so sorry that you had to go through that. On the bright side, you sill managed to look super hot in the picture with you, Hayden (I think) and Santa. Hope you feel better soon (and not just because I want to see you post more pics from Christmas:)). Hey, I'll talk to you later but we might be coming out that way over Easter. We are going to try really hard. I'll call you as soon as I know more details. I just wanted to give you a head up.; 5:30 PM
The Shill Spill said...: You should see our Santa pictures from the ward party. :) Carson looks A LOT more stressed out that he has to be sitting with me on Santa's lap than Hayden does! :) hahahaha! Awwww....the torture we put them through, ey?; 9:29 AM
Becky said...: Hope you all are feeling better. It made the rounds through our house 3 times before it ended...I could have done without 3 weeks of that. I'm sorry it was on Christmas for you guys.; 9:01 PM

Jackson"s Quote Wall of Fame

1.10 "Mom! I figured it out! White is the same color as milk and snow!"
10.27.09 - "Mom, why do you do what you do-ed when you did, (pause) what you did?" (Translation - Why do you always do that?)
7.23.09 - When we were in Michigan Grandma Jones asked about the talk I gave on Sunday. She said, "Shelly what was your talk on?" Without looking up from his dinner Jackson said, "It was on a piece of paper."
"Ugh, I am fwustwated! You guys stop laughing at me." (Talking to me and Ty)
"Mom, what happens if we don't have arms?"
"Mom, what happens if we don't have lips?"
"Mom, what happens if we don't have uvulas?"
"Mom, I have an infection in my throat. It's behind my uvula."
Whenever Hayden is being reprimanded or sent to time out Jackson asks, "Mom, are you happy at me?" or he says, "Mom, I am a good boy."
"Daddy, I'm going to get you two earings and a nice dress because you are a girl."
While crying Jackson said, "Mom, I have tears coming out. I'm just going to let them fall, they will just dry."
"Mom, did I pop out of your belly button?"
"Mommy, did you know Santa loves me?"
After I put Jackson to bed he came out and said, "Mom. Stop making noises! I can't sleep. No spraying (I had been pre-treating laundry with shout) or talking, or wrestling, or just, like, playing with dad." And then he huffed back to his room.
"Ow, Mom! I hurt my leg. Now I won't be so stinkin cute!"
"Dad, I want you to read me stories. You big fat pig!"
Jackson: "Mom, I'm going to lick you." Me: "Do NOT lick me." Jackson: "Do you want me to put a candy corn up your nose?" (As if those two things are related. Don't lick, therefore, stick candy corns up my nose.)
"Daddy sits in dog poo and does his homework. HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE"
(While we were driving in the car) Mom! I have to go potty! Can I pee on the car?
I'm just a leeeeeeeetle bit mad, not a lot mad, just a leeeeeeeeetle bit.
"The Holy Ghost has three holes."
"No! Don't kill the fly! He doesn't want to be killed! He wants to be alive!" Me: "Jackson, I'm going to kill the fly. It's in my house and they're gross." Jackson: "I will just squish the spiders." Me: "If you get to squish the spiders, I get to kill the flies." Jackson: "Ok."
Me: "Jackson, I love you." Jackson: "You're welcome. I love you too."
Jackson: "Is your tooth all gone?' Me: "Yes." (I had to get a tooth pulled) Jackson:"I will just be a Dentist so that I can just put your tooth back in for you." (Won't that be the greatest day of my life, when my son becomes a dentist? Then he can really help me when I'm old and all my teeth have even more major problems.)
Jackson: "I love you now Mommy, but I didn't love you at the store."
Me: "Tell you father not to be ridiculous." Jackson: "Don't be a dickless."
Jackson came down the hall with a blanket tied around him like a cape. "Mom, I have a cape! Will you help me fly?" Two minutes later, "Mom! I need help!" (He still wasn't flying.)
"I need blue floss so my teeth won't fall out."
"I ate all my sugary junk."
Almost every night when Jackson is going to bed he stalls by asking, "Mom can I watch a show with you? Can I watch Dancing Through The Stars?"
"Can I have my own Marshmallow Maybes?" ( I have told him a thousand times that it is "Mateys")
Grandpa Jones came over and saw our new couches. Jackson informed him that, "Your bum goes here!" and pointed to a spot on the couch.
While looking at himself in the mirror Jackson said, "You are my best friend."
As we were reading a book about the Great Barrier Reef by Australia Jackson said, "You go there with Daddy tomorrow and Grandma Jones will watch me." (Don't I wish?)
While pointing the remote at Ty: "I turned you into a TV!"
After I spiked Jackson's hair he looked into the mirror and said, "I look like a porcupine!"
Phrases Jackson says every day: "Would that be sound good?" and "What color is the (his) poo?"
While walking from our car to our house, a dog was running around on the grass and started running toward Jackson. He screamed the loudest high-pitch scream ever uttered by a child and then yelled, "Mommy, Mommy!" while running to me. After we made it into the house Jackson said (while crying), "I'm scared of dogs. I just like cats."
Jackson: "You are a cookie. I'm going to eat you all gone." Shelly: "No you are a cookie" J: "(Gasp) I am not a cookie! I don't go in the oven!"
Jackson to Tyler: "Turn around, leave, and never come back."
"Awwwww, you are my precious mommy."
"You are a pineapple. I'm going to eat you up."
"I have to go on a mission at church. I have to leave. You can't come. Don't cry mom."
Jackson: "I want to go to the Trampolines (Jump On It)!" Me: "We'll go when you're potty trained." J: "I don't want my potty train!"
"Good job mom. You good job jobber. You're a great job." (Apparently I've been emphasizing "good job" lately.)
"I'm a sad little monkey. I need my grandma."
Jackson: "On Christmas we will celebrate Jesus's Birthday and he will need a party hat."
(Jackson was talking about the Book, "How the Grinch Stole Christmas") Jackson: "And the Grinch tried to steal their stuff." Me: "We don't steal things, do we?" Jackson: "Do we play nicely with the Grinch?"
(Jackson was hopping on the floor like a frog instead of eating dinner) Me: "Eat your food frog!" Jackson: "Eat your mommy! Ribbit."
"You've got to be kidding me guys!"
"Do dogs eat dog poo?"
Me: Do you want a party with Grandma and Grandpa? Jackson: No I want to party with Santa.

Hayden is Talking

2.4.11 "He is being a goofpants." (talking about Jackson)
2.4.11 "He is being a slow coach." (Also talking about Jackson - and his ability to get ready for bed.)
12.8.10 "Mom, did you go to a baby shower?" Me: "Yes." H: "Did you put the baby in the shower?!"
6.10 "Mom, it is indescribable because it's not describable."
Hayden: "Mom, what are you reading?" Me: "Fablehaven." Hayden: GASP "Like me?" Me: "What do you mean?" Hayden: "FableHAYDEN!"
1.10 Me: "Hayden your brother is hyper!" Hayden: "Is he going to go to hyperspace?"
When I put Hayden down for a nap I always tell him not to break the rules (which are basically no getting out of bed). The other day he came out of his room after taking a nap and said, "Mom. I fixed the rules. They aren't broke." (aka - he went right to sleep and didn't get out of bed.)
8.16.09 "Mom, are you done being a cranky pants?:
When Hayden was mad at me he said, "AAAAAH! I want to BONK you on de HEAD!" And he did.
Mommy: "Hayden, where do we go pee pee?" Hayden: "On . . . the . . . FLOOR! Hahahahaha."
"It stinks like a horse!"
"What's up, sir?"
"I have a question for you! What is happening?"
"Mom, can I be nakie for a minute?"
"Mom, sing Alladin" (I'm translating) Me: "You sing Alladin" (A whole new world) Hayden: "Ok. Go Laddi, Go Laddi, Go Laddi."
Tonight Jackson found the big dipper in the sky and said, "Look! The big dipper!" To which Hayden said, "Star! No Dip!"
"More Kistal (Crystal) Light!" I'm trying to replace my Diet Dr. Pepper with something, and apparently he's caught on to what it is.
"No sceeeming (screaming) Hyrum! (Those of you in my ward might know who he was yelling this at.)
Belly Button = "Buddy Button"
Hayden came with me to practice the organ. He stood up on the bench ( which he knows he is not suppossed to do) Then, with a huge smile on his face, he said, "Naughty!"
Jackson had to go potty and I told him to show Hayden how to do it. He was standing up and when he started to go pee pee Hayden said the most enthusiastic, "Oh Wow!" I've ever heard him say.